Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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