hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
