Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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