So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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