It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
