1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
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