I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize