I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
