so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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