So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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