he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
