I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
