Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
