they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH