carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
