I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
