I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Randomize
