apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize