Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Of course I have a pirate flag
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
