Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Green mimosas i think yes
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
