You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
im six kinds of drunk right now
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize