We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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