she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
