doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
