I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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