I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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