Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
People with herpes should wear stickers.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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