he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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