you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize
