Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
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