Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
