This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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