508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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