Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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