Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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