I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I have fence marks all over my body
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
