There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
