yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
farters have to be the big spoon...
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
