um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
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You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
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Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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