Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
you guys were way drunker than both of me
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
