You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
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