Hey man sorry I got all grabby
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
