He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
