After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize