apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Bring me that man meat
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
