I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
