I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
