I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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