Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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