Midget sex pt 2 tonight
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
