I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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