So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
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i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
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Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.